this chapter is brought to you by mio
as translator, proofreader and editor!
I see. So he wasn’t given the name Muso lightly, just because of the way he ran forward ignorantly like a rhinoceros, but it was a name that was given with a deep trust in this child’s infinite potential.
I felt an inexplicable sense of defeat upon hearing the story behind his name.
The woman that was me 100 years ago was really cool. To even be able to let someone keep such wonderful words in their hearts for the rest of their lives.
“There are a lot of people who have been waiting for Your Highness other than me as well! Especially Sir Tanma, the aide, when Your Highness saw his odd eye that was said to be bad luck, and for the first time in his life, he heard you say that ‘Your uniqueness will bring good luck’. That’s why the aide, who used to wear an eyepatch, now wears a monocle. Haha.”
You were even able to make someone else’s insecurity something they should be proud of.
“Those bastards who are still waiting anxiously for Your Highness in the demon realm must be so jealous that I’ve become Your Highness’ exclusive errand boy! Since it’s thanks to Your Highness that they’ve been able to protect their pride, and of course, their life!”
You became a life’s saviour that makes someone pledge a loyalty that wouldn’t fade, even after 100 years had passed by.
‘With that promise as my motivation, I’ve endured an unbearable 100 years.’
You made someone fall so deeply in love that they’d even wait 100 years.
This… there’s no way to beat this. How could I win over such a wonderful person who left such a deep mark on the hearts of so many people?
My head drooped. I was disappointed.
I had tried to find out more about myself from 100 years ago to gauge how different we were. If we were too different, I was going to try and satisfy Lecht’s expectations and be more like me back then. If that didn’t work, then I was going to try and seduce him by acting with more charm than her. But how was I meant to fight with such a big gap between us already from the start?
‘To think I could feel such a sense of defeat from myself.’
This world’s wellbeing, and the fall of the empire, I suddenly felt as if it were all in vain.
“Y-Your Highness? D-Did I say something wrong? Why are you crying?!”
“I’m not crying.”
“Your words and your actions don’t match though?!”
I could see Muso waving his hand in every direction, flustered.
I really didn’t want to cry over something like this, but the tears kept coming out of frustration and urgency.
“I-I would like to wipe away your tears, but Your Highness is sitting on my handkerchief…! I-I deserve to die for my sin! I’ll go and receive my punishment, so please stop crying!”
Muso began to beg while saying something extreme again, but I couldn’t bear to tell him the truth. How could I tell him that I was crying because I was jealous of myself 100 years ago?
It was then. A large shadow fell over the two of us.
“Last time, you fearlessly confessed your love to my woman, and this time, you made her cry?”
Lecht, who had appeared from god knows where, was looking down at us.
“You wouldn’t be able to pay her back for her tears, even with your life.”
He looked angry. Very angry.
“Your Majesty, that’s…!”
Muso, who was about to protest, shut his mouth and prostrated himself flat on the floor.
“I’m sorry!! I’ll happily accept whatever punishment you give me!”
No, why are you taking the blame all by yourself? I opened my mouth to explain that it wasn’t Muso’s fault, but Lecht was faster.
“I’ll decide on how to dispose of you later.”
He came toward me, leaving Muso who had merged himself with the ground.
“Lecht, this… heok!”
I opened my mouth in the atmosphere that seemed to need me to explain why I cried, but he suddenly hugged me tightly. Caught off guard by him princess carrying me, I stopped crying.
“Whatever the reason is, let’s go inside first. It’s cold.”
My body was cold, just like he said. No matter how much Muso had tried to generate warm air in my direction, it was still basically autumn weather.
“…I’m fine though.”
“Well, I’m not.”
When I let out a sound that said I didn’t want it, he cut it off with a single sentence.
With my mood suddenly pleasant for no reason, I leaned against him.
“It’s not actually Muso’s fault.”
“If you say so, okay.”
“You can’t keep scolding someone who’s innocent.”
“I’m getting suspicious since you keep covering for him though.”
As I spoke in a stern voice, he smiled faintly and hugged me even tighter.
“Don’t worry. Since that’s what you want, I won’t do anything.”
His words once again showed that he fully respected my opinion. Lecht’s words always started and ended with me like this. I thought this was extremely good at first.
When a man who seemed to be cold began to take care of me with such a gentle expression, my stomach filled with butterflies… but now that I realised I was extremely different to the woman I was 100 years ago through my conversation with Muso, I started to feel repulsed. His affection was suffocating.
Although they all claim that it was ‘me’, she and I were still two different people from my point of view. I wanted to look like her, and share the same memories as her.
As all these complicated thoughts were rolling around in my gloomy heart, Lecht had already arrived at my room before I even noticed. He lowered me onto the sofa and began to wrap me tightly in a blanket that was folded next to me.
“What are you doing…?”
When I asked him about his behaviour that was completely random and wasn’t like his usual behaviour at all, he handed me a warm cup of milk I didn’t even know when he had prepared.
“When you’re sad, you feel better after being wrapped up in your blanket and drinking something warm.
“Did the me from 100 years ago do that?”
It was something that I knew, even if I hadn’t finished my sentence. I just asked for no reason. No matter what happens, it’ll always end with that woman from 100 years ago.
“Can you tell me why you were crying now?”
As I stared at the warm milk in my hands, Lecht sat in front of me and asked. It was an expression that showed his determination to destroy anything that made me cry.
“Lecht is so considerate.”
I brought up my feelings honestly.
“I’m sad because Lecht is too nice.”
Although I could see his bewildered expression, I said what I had to say. There was no way I could solve this problem by myself anyway.
However, contrary to my seriousness, he smirked instead.
“Whether it was 100 years ago or now… you’re the only one who would say things that no one else would agree with, like how I’m considerate.”
Again, again! Again with the me from 100 years ago! I pouted.
“Seriously, just what on earth did that woman not do…”
I set my cup of milk down, trying to soothe my ugly heart.
“I have something to tell you. It’s important.”
I thought my seriousness about this matter wouldn’t be conveyed if I was wrapped up in a blanket, so I adjusted my posture and sat down.
“Let’s start afresh again.”
I realised I had spoken out too hastily when I finally spit the words out, so I quickly added.
“I’m talking about this relationship. It’s a strange relationship, it’s like we’re a couple, but not a couple.”
That’s how it was if you looked at it.
He referred to me as ‘my woman’, yet we had never established what our relationship was. Although he confessed his deep feelings for me, it was a story of how he had been waiting for the me from 100 years ago, so he wouldn’t let me go now that I had appeared.
It wasn’t a confession of love for me, nor did I really know what feelings I had in my heart for him.
Although it was true that my heart would flutter for him, if you asked me if I liked him, then I really didn’t know yet. The most honest answer I could give was probably to say that I didn’t have enough feelings for him to turn into lovers yet.
“I know that Lecht has been waiting for me for 100 years. Thank you so much for the care I’ve witnessed personally. But…”
I tried to find a way to convey my thoughts as clearly as possible in order not to hurt his feelings.
“To be honest with you, I don’t know.”
“You don’t know?”
“The me from 100 years ago doesn’t feel like me.”
Apart from not having any memories of her, the more I heard about her, the more I felt estranged from her. She was a more confident, more accepting, and wiser woman than I was.
“So actually… I’m a little scared at how much affection Lecht is giving me.”
Lecht’s brow furrowed slightly at my words.
“I’m afraid I won’t be able to live up to Lecht’s expectations. I’m scared that Lecht will be disappointed once he finds out that the real me is very different from what Lecht thought I’d be.”
“Don’t get me wrong though! It’s absolutely not that I dislike receiving Lecht’s affection at all!”
I could sense a hint of impatience in the voice that said my name, so I added quickly.
“How should I put this… I think I’ll need some time to get used to it.”
“Plus, I don’t actually know a lot about you either, Lecht. Of course, other than being the Demon King, having waited for me, and being a considerate person. Although I know all of that… I still think it may be too early for us to define our relationship with just that alone.”
I explained my stance on this as calmly as possible, hoping that he wouldn’t get offended.
“So, can we start all over again?”
“I will try to get to know more about Lecht as soon as possible and get used to your affection. So, please stop thinking about the me from 100 years ago, and just look at the me in front of you right now.”
I understand that it’d be difficult. But at some point, it was an issue that had to be brought up, at least once. It wasn’t like I could suddenly find my memories from 100 years ago, nor was it possible for me, or him to bear his burdensome feelings.
“Is that too much for me to ask for?”
But that was just my opinion anyway. This could have seemed like an unreasonable request from his point of view.
I looked into his eyes and asked him.
However, the look on his face as he looked at me wasn’t one of bewilderment or anger. Nor was he disappointed or flustered. It was full of affection. As if I was cute for making such a request.
From his point of view, it must have been bewildering for a lover, who he had finally met again after 100 years, to want to start from zero again. As I was waiting for his answer, he suddenly burst into laughter.
“So this is what it feels like to hear that.”
“So, is it my turn to tell you this?”
When I tilted my head, he reached out his hand to hold my clenched fist. He then added with a faint smile.
“Even if this world splits in two, I will never be disappointed in you.”
“No, that’s why the me right now may not live up to what you think of me…!”
“Even if you are substantially different to the person you were 100 years ago, my heart won’t change. Since what I love about you is your very existence.”
He cut off my hasty protest.
“But I’ll try. I’ll only look at the you right now.”
Somehow, it felt as if there was a smile in his voice. He whispered with such a cheerful expression on his face that I wondered if I had really just pushed this man away.
“I already know how loveable of a woman you are, so it’ll be hard for me to ignore everything though.”
He continued to speak affectionately, as if he didn’t care about my face turning red or not.
“I will try to restrain myself so as not to make you feel burdened. However, can you cut me some slack if my feelings jump out of control sometimes?”
“Since you’re just too loveable.”
I felt as if the world had stopped when he put an end to his sentence.
How could this man be so radiant, even at this moment when I’ve rejected him?
He smiled as he carefully examined my face, which must have already turned a ripe peach colour. It was a smile that made me unable to fight back.
“That much should be acceptable, right?”
Although I should’ve said no, I wasn’t in any position to protest. My heart kept pounding and blood kept rushing to my head making my eyes go wide.
My thoughts and everything flew away at those words that sounded like a complaint.
It was clear that he either didn’t take my request seriously, or that he enjoyed my flustered reaction whenever he was determined and seductive. Otherwise, there’s no way he could have such a pleased expression on his face.
Of course, I had nothing to say and just nodded dazedly at him again, as if I had been mesmerised.
pls do not share this anywhere or the transmigration gods will transport u into boku no pico !! this translation has been stolen from mioscorner.com, pls only read there i’m begging u :kneels:
* * *
Lecht acted well according to my request. The way he expressed his affection was no longer as over the top as before and had definitely decreased, and he never brought up how I was like ‘100 years ago’.
Although I couldn’t say I didn’t feel regretful at all, I was satisfied since it at least wasn’t burdensome or uncomfortable anymore. However, before we were even able to adjust to our relationship’s new dynamic, a piece of news arrived that would change everything.
It was the obituary of the Head of the Ezzarson Guild.
the dog food to us single dogs in this chapter was just too much,,,i literally just vomited blood from all the diabetes i got HGLSDKFFSDJ
also we stan communication bc feeling like someone loves the idea of u more than u is never a nice feeling 😦
also i had some rlly good malaysian food for dinner today so i’m v happy ghsdlkfds been craving laksa for so long already HAHAHAH